Into the Weekend 07.11/25

The best part of death in Jewish tradition is the shiva that follows.

This is because there is 1000% certainty that a shiva food tray will be served. For those in the dark on these matters, the shiva food tray is an absolutely beautiful thing with many incarnations. It can be fleshich (meat), typically with corned beef, pastrami, roast beef, rye bread, pumpernickel bread, pickles, mustard, chopped liver, a potato salad and/or coleslaw, and some onions for good measure.

In less religious households, the tray may even break kosher barriers (oy!) by including an array of assorted sliced cheeses (no judgment). Obviously there is probably an additional upcharge for this.

Hands down, the best shiva food trays are the fish trays, highlighting rolled up lox (both nova AND regular), chunks of smoked fish, herring, the aforementioned potato salad and/or coleslaw, tuna fish salad, and my absolute favorite: a heaping mound of whitefish salad. Add the trimmings of cut tomatoes, sliced red onions and cucumbers, salty olives, creamed cheese, and a fabulous assortment of bagels (excluding, of course, the shanda raisin bagel), and you have one helluva frigging out-of-the-park shiva platter.

Even though all of this may sound too good to be true, the real problem with shiva meals comes with the side dishes and desserts that the visiting throngs of folks bring in their own Tupperware: kugels, bundt cakes, cookies, casseroles, rugelach, and even gefilte fish which we all know originally came from a jar. 

If consoling the bereaved at a shiva is a high priority, these loving and caring friends and family who bring these side dishes want only one thing more: their Tupperware back. Promptly. And cleaned. With hypoallergenic dish soap.

Now if I’m mourning, the last thing I want is to keep track of accumulated piles of Tupperware and their tops. With so many sizes, shapes, colors, and constitutions (glass ones are best because you can easily microwave the leftovers), it can be overwhelming, requiring patience, organization, and - in many cases - lots of medication.

So now when I go to a shiva with a delicacy packed in Tupperware, I do the unthinkable and utter words unheard in nearly 6000 years of Jewish history: “keep the Tupperware.” 

This simple-yet-magnanimous gesture means so much more to mourners than any hug, words of consolation, or even a tree planted in Israel in memory of the deceased. Try saying it out loud: "Keep the Tupperware". [pause]. Feels good, right?

I’m a firm believer in simple-yet-magnanimous gestures in real estate too. If you’re a seller, leave a bottle of welcome Champagne in the fridge which your buyer can discover during the walk-through just prior to closing. Your buyer will be less likely to make a stink about the faded floors they discover in the living room from the rug you removed - or the powder room mirror your movers “inadvertently” packed and took in the move.

If you’re a buyer, then don’t ask your seller to fix stupid crap after your inspection - stuff which either you probably knew about or stuff which might cost less than $10 - like a missing GFCI outlet in the kitchen. This feel-good karma will work to your benefit when you later ask for unreasonable extensions of your mortgage contingency because your lender was on vacation in Turks and Caicos.

Yes, my friends, simple-yet-magnanimous gestures will get you through both the highs of life (real estate, of course) and the unfortunate lows (death). 

On that note, have a great weekend!

Best,

Brad